New adults: Children who are now adults

If you have read some of my previous blogs, you will know that 

we have become empty nesters in the past few years.  

I have enjoyed being a mom of an adult.  

I keep wanting to describe them as 'adult children', 

but they are not...adult children.  

There are a lot of advantages of becoming an adult:

 independence, 

the opportunity to gain respect of maturity and wisdom,

 the opportunity to fully experience bad decision making and 

consequences with no parental net to cushion

 the fall for bad decisions, the opportunity to 

experience good decision making and 

consequences with many people to stand around cheering 

for good decisions, time is our own with no dictators, 

work could be my choice (or not), sleeping could 

be my choice (or not),  what and 

when to eat (or not)....

so many advantages. 

There is a disadvantage to becoming adult: 

 the mindset of being self-reliant - (PRIDEFUL) -

thinking that I can do it alone.  

As we navigate sharing this world with these 'new' adults 

(ours and others), we experience and hear other's 

experience with these 'new' adults 

wrestling the question "How do we do this?".  Our 

pastor and his wife gave us some good advice: 

they are no different than any other adult you share this world with.  

If we plan to have a relationship with 

these adults, old and new, some key ingredients 

are prayer, consideration and the freedom, 

for ourselves and these new adults, 

to make decisions as they see fit for their family.  

When they exercise good decision-making, 

praise God and cheer with the loudest voice on their side of the fence.  

When they exercise bad decision-making, 

praise God andstand with them, 

without judgement, to allow them the opportunity to 

see it as a bad judgement and take responsibility of correction.  

These 'new adults', that were once my children, are adults 

- PERIOD - 

that I had the privilege of watching 

grow up and step in to their adult roles.  

What they need from me now is not my 

parenting skills...they need me to apply a generous

 amount of prayer and freedom to figure out how to 

throttle the advantages of being an adult.  

One thing that hasn't changed: 

I still want to protect them, correct them, and guide them. 

Another thing that hasn't changed: 

I still pray for them.